Offering Healthy Choices
Toddlers are learning to navigate their world, communicate, and
exert control over aspects of their lives. They don't actually
have control over much, but eating is one of the first areas they
will master. Parents can help them enjoy their limited power by
giving them appropriate amounts of freedom when it comes to
choosing foods and eating them.
That's not to say toddlers are deciding what to have for
dinner. Parents have the important job of providing the kinds of
foods that an active toddler needs. A parent's role is to
present healthy foods and let the child decide which ones to eat -
or whether to eat at all. Savvy parents can steer a toddler toward
healthy eating, but they may have to do it in a crafty way.
By anticipating problems and offering choices, parents teach
kids which behaviors will yield positive results and which ones
won't. Here's how you can turn common concerns into
opportunities to teach healthy eating habits.
Most Toddlers Are Picky Eaters
Many toddlers express their budding independence through eating
- or not eating, as the case may be. So nearly all toddlers could
be described as picky eaters. If kids don't like a food, they
won't eat it - no rocket science there.
Does your toddler want to eat only macaroni and cheese? When a
child is stuck on one food, a parent might feel forced to serve
that food every day so the child eats something. But eventually the
child may tire of that food - and then what?
You choose the foods on your toddler's plate - and you
don't have to serve macaroni and cheese daily. If you do, you
miss an opportunity to introduce new foods and increase the number
of those your child is willing to eat. Most "food jags,"
as they're sometimes called, won't last long if parents
don't accommodate them.
Kids won't starve and they will learn to be more flexible
rather than go hungry. Present a variety of healthy foods -
including established favorites and some new foods - to make up the
menu. Your toddler may surprise you one day by eating all of
them.
Your toddler doesn't like green beans the first time around?
Don't stop serving them. Kids are naturally slow to accept new
tastes and textures, so keep reintroducing the beans. Serve a small
portion and encourage your child to try a bite without nagging or
forcing.
And be sure you're setting a good example! Serve nutritious
foods that you like or eat something new so your kids see you
enjoying what you're asking them to eat.
Don't Bargain for Bites
You want your child to eat the spinach you serve; your child
drops it onto the floor. Your well-meaning impulse may be to start
talking up nutritious foods, saying how big and strong spinach will
make your child. Or you might start bargaining: "Well, if you
eat three more bites, I'll give you a cookie." The problem
is that these tactics don't work in the long run.
Who hasn't used the line about spinach making you strong?
But this cajoling approach may build dislike for the healthy food
rather than increase acceptance. This doesn't mean you
shouldn't teach kids about the benefits of healthy foods, but
don't push too much by celebrating every bite of spinach your
toddler eats or disapproving when he or she refuses.
For some kids, dinner becomes a negotiation session from the
very start, and parents have been using dessert as an incentive for
decades. But this doesn't encourage healthy eating. Instead it
creates the impression that "treats" are more valuable
than mealtime food. Foods like candy and cookies are not essential
to your child's diet and it is not a deprivation to avoid
serving them during the toddler years.
Threatening a punishment, much like bribing a child with
dessert, ultimately isn't effective either. It creates a power
struggle. To encourage healthy eating, continue offering your child
an array of nutritious choices - and keep the mealtime mood
upbeat.
Also try these strategies:
- Serve right-sized portions.
Parents often overestimate how much food a child should eat.
Especially with foods that aren't yet favorites, a couple of
tablespoons is plenty to start with. Small portions are less
overwhelming, while bigger portions may encourage
overeating.
- Don't negotiate.
It's fine to encourage kids to "try one bite" but
don't fall into the negotiating trap. Prepare and serve
healthy meals and let them decide what to eat.
- Have family meals together.
Set your toddler's place at the family table - it's good
for kids of this age to see their parents and siblings eating
together and eating healthy foods. Kids eat a more nutritious
diet, with more fruits and vegetables, when they regularly have
family meals.
- Create positive peer pressure.
Toddlers are more likely to eat fruits and vegetables if they see
their peers eating them, so look for opportunities where they can
eat healthy with friends.
Let Kids Feed Themselves
Kids should start finger feeding around 9 months of age and try
using utensils by 15-18 months. Provide many opportunities for
this, but make sure your toddler eats enough so that the experience
doesn't lead to frustration. Jump in to help when necessary,
but pay attention to hunger cues and signs that your child is
full. You can always offer more if your child still seems hungry,
but you can't take the food back if you overfeed. When
you're controlling the fork or spoon, resist the urge to slip
in one more bite. And as your toddler gets the hang of eating, step
back and let your child take over.
Some parents think that not letting kids feed themselves is for
the best, but it takes away control that rightfully belongs to kids
at this age. They need to decide whether to eat, what they will
eat, and how much to eat - this is how they learn to recognize the
internal cues that tell them when they're hungry and when
they're full. Just as important, toddlers need to learn and
practice the mechanics of feeding themselves.
Listen to Your Child
Be alert to what toddlers say through their actions. A child who
is building a tower of crackers or dropping carrots on the floor
may be telling you he or she is full. Pushing food on a child
who's not hungry may dull the internal cues that help kids know
when they've eaten enough.
But this doesn't mean that it's practical or advisable
for kids to eat on demand all day long. Those who eat all day may
not learn what it is like to be hungry or full. That's why
structured meals and snack times are important.
Kids can manage their hunger when they come to expect that food
will be available during certain times of the day. If a child
chooses not to eat anything at all, simply offer food again at the
next meal or snack time.
What If Kids Skip a Meal?
Many toddlers need to eat often - as much as six times a day,
including three meals and two or three snacks. Keep this in mind as
you establish a pattern of meal and snacks. But realize that a food
schedule only sets the times that you will present food to your
toddler. Your child may not take every opportunity to eat.
Allowing a child to skip a meal is a difficult concept because
many of us were raised to clean our plates and not waste food. But
kids should be allowed to respond to their own hunger cues, a vital
skill when it comes to maintaining a healthy weight. That means
eating when hungry - and sometimes not eating, even if it's
time for Thanksgiving dinner.
Establish times for meals and snacks and try to stick to them. A
child who skips a meal finds it reassuring to know when to expect
the next one. Avoid offering snacks or pacifying hungry kids with
cups of milk or juice right before a meal - this can diminish the
appetite and decrease their willingness to try a new food being
offered.
Avoid the Junk Food Trap
Toddlers need to eat healthy to get the nutrients their growing
bodies need. Candy, potato chips, and other low-nutrient "junk
foods" shouldn't be part of their diet because they can
crowd out the healthy foods needed. Also, food preferences are
established early in life, so don't miss opportunities to help
your toddler develop a taste for nutritious foods.
Even if your child likes candy or chips, don't feel like you
must give in. Kids can't run to the store to buy them, so just
don't keep them in the house.
If your toddler asks for candy, simply say, "We don't
have any candy." Then present two healthy snack alternatives
to choose from. Even a child who mourns the lack of candy will
still enjoy the sense of control from deciding which healthy snack
to eat.
Reviewed by:
Mary L. Gavin, MD
Date reviewed: May 2008
Note: All information is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice,
diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.
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