Enrolling your little one in preschool can be a time filled with
many questions: How well will my child adjust to preschool? Will my
child make friends? Will the teacher understand my child?
Establishing and maintaining an open, clear channel of
communication with your child's preschool teacher can lessen
many parental concerns.
Getting to Know the Teacher
When
selecting a preschool
, there are many factors to consider: safety, cleanliness, general
curriculum, overall philosophy, cost, and location. Try to meet the
teacher before making your selection and make an appointment to
visit the classroom. Watch how the teacher interacts with the kids,
talk with the teacher, and ask questions.
While in the classroom, pay attention to how the teacher runs
the class and how the children respond to his or her direction. If
the kids seem happy and interact well with the teacher, chances are
good that the teacher's classroom style will be a fit for your
child as well.
When you talk with the teacher, ask about a typical day. You may
also want to ask specific questions, such as, "If my child
came into class crying one morning, how might you handle
that?" or "How do you deal with a child who hits
others?" Other useful questions might include how the teacher
handles discipline,
temper tantrums
,
toilet teaching
, biting, or other preschooler concerns.
A teacher's answers can help you evaluate how creative he or
she might be in responding to everyday classroom dilemmas. You can
also learn a great deal from how responsive a teacher is to your
questions. If the teacher appears defensive, uncomfortable, or
uninterested while replying to your inquiries, that could signal
future communication problems and may mean that the teacher and
preschool aren't right for your family.
Parent-Teacher Conferences
Some preschools schedule meetings during the year to discuss a
child's developmental and behavioral progress. Typically, these
conferences cover a child's
play
style and social, language, cognitive, and physical
development.
A parent-teacher conference should be the time for listening and
communicating openly. If your child's teacher has prepared a
formal report for the meeting, let him or her go through it before
asking questions.
Most of the time, a preschool teacher will emphasize your
child's strengths. But the parent-teacher conference also
offers an opportunity to point out areas that your child may need
to work on. For example, a teacher may suggest writing letters,
stringing beads, or practicing cutting skills at home to improve
fine motor skills.
If the teacher has concerns about your child, try not to become
defensive - this may make the teacher hesitant to discuss any
problems for fear of confrontation. Try to ask direct and focused
questions, with the assumption that any problems raised are ones
that can be solved. Because of the limited time of most
parent-teacher conferences, however, it might be useful to schedule
a future time when any troublesome issues can be discussed in more
detail.
If your work schedule doesn't allow you to attend
conferences or if the preschool doesn't schedule them, you
should feel comfortable making arrangements to speak with the
teacher at other times. Meeting or talking regularly with the
teacher will help you understand your child's progress and
demonstrate your interest and cooperation.
Discussing Problems
When problems such as biting arise, the best tip is for parents
and the teacher to sit down and discuss the issue together. If your
child has serious behavioral problems, talk to your doctor, who can
work with your child and may refer you to a psychologist.
If your preschooler complains about the teacher, try to find out
the specifics. Often, preschoolers might complain if they're
put in time-out or not given a popular classroom job, such as line
leader. It's helpful if you support the teacher and talk to
your child about following rules or taking turns.
In deciding whether to bring up a problem with a preschool
teacher, it's important not to overestimate a preschooler's
point of view. If, for example, your toddler complains that
"no one plays with me" or "I'm bored" in
school, give it some time if it doesn't seem serious.
Preschoolers' likes and dislikes frequently change, and
they're just starting to learn how to interact with other kids
their age. Also, there's a whole range of factors, including
whether they're sick, hungry, or tired, that can influence
day-to-day reactions to school. However, if your child continues to
complain, acts different from usual, or is unusually
unhappy
, contact the teacher at once.
If you have concerns about the teacher's style or
performance, talk to him or her first. If your concerns aren't
resolved to your satisfaction, your next stop should be the
teacher's supervisor. Try to work out any problems rather than
changing preschool teachers midyear, unless absolutely necessary.
Kids who are switched to a new school might interpret that to mean
that whenever there's a problem, it can be solved with a new
teacher or a new school. It's better to show kids how to work
through problems rather than avoid them.
Building a Relationship
It's important to form a good relationship with your
child's preschool teacher - for both you and your child.
Approach the teacher with an open mind and clear, direct questions,
so that you can be a part of your child's preschool experience
and take pride in your little one's achievements.
Remember to also share praise - both yours and your child's
- with the teacher, as well as his or her supervisor ("My
child really enjoys storytime," for example). This approach
not only makes the teacher feel appreciated, but also creates a
positive framework that makes it easier for teachers to receive any
negative feedback in a constructive way.
Think of yourself and your child's teacher as a united team
whose shared goal is to help make your child's preschool
experience a happy and productive one.
Reviewed by:
Mary L. Gavin, MD
Date reviewed: September 2007
Note: All information is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice,
diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.
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