I'm being deployed. How do I tell my child?
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Deb
Parents who are being deployed walk a fine line. They know they
have to prepare their children for the challenges ahead, yet they
don't want to worry them any more than necessary.
The best thing to do is to tell kids the truth - that Mom or Dad
has to go away to do their job for our country - and to give
explanations at a level they can understand. For example, young
children have a limited concept of time, so their worries tend to
focus on their daily routine (Who will take me to school in the
morning? Who will tuck me in at night?). They need to know
who'll be caring for them and keeping them safe in your
absence.
Older kids, on the other hand, might have more concerns about
the length of the separation and your well being. Reassure them as
best you can that you are well trained to do your job and that
every effort will be made to keep you safe.
Let children know it's OK to miss you - you'll be
missing them, too. Talk about the ways you will keep your
relationship strong - email, letters, photos, videos, even
promising to think of each other at the same time every day. And
finally, be sure to spend plenty of one-on-one time with your child
in the days and weeks before your departure. These are the memories
your child will hold on to until you return.
For more information, check out these articles:
When a Parent Goes to War
For Teens: When Loved Ones Go to War
For Kids: Worrying About War
Reviewed by:
W. Douglas Tynan, PhD, and D'Arcy Lyness, PhD
Date reviewed: April 2008
Note: All information is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice,
diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.
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