Many kids have habits that can be downright annoying. Four of
the most common ones that children develop and parents complain
about are:
- nail biting
- thumb sucking
- hair twirling
- nose picking
Although your child's habits may bother or even worry you,
relax. In most cases, a habit is just a phase in the normal
developmental process and is
not
cause for alarm.
What's a Habit?
A habit is a pattern of behavior that's repeated, and the
person usually isn't even aware of it. Although kids may be
blissfully unaware of a habit, their parents aren't so
lucky.
And if your little one usually has one hand stuffed in the mouth
and the other entwined in the hair, don't be surprised: Habits
tend to occur in clusters. Here's the lowdown on the most
common habits among kids and teens:
Nail Biting
If nails chewed to the nub are familiar to you, you're not
alone. One of the most common childhood habits is nail biting or
picking.
Some studies estimate that 30% to 60% of kids and teens chew on
one or more fingernails. And, occasionally, a child may also bite
his or her toenails.
Boys and girls appear equally prone to the habit in earlier
years; however, as they get older, boys are more likely to be nail
biters.
Hair Twirling
If one of your kids is a hair twirler, odds are it's your
daughter. The majority of children who twist, stroke, or pull their
hair are girls.
Hair twirling may appear in early childhood as a precursor to
hair pulling, either with or without hair loss. But many hair
twirlers and pullers stop as they get older. For those who
don't, simple behavior modification can help them break the
habit. However, for those who start hair pulling as older kids or
teens, the habit is harder to break and may be a sign of
anxiety
,
depression
, or
obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
.
Nose Picking
Nose picking appears to be a habit that, although it usually
begins in childhood, may actually linger into adulthood. If you
find that hard to believe, consider that a 1995 study of adults
found that 91% picked their noses regularly - and about 8% of them
reported that they eat what they pick!
Thumb Sucking
The popularity of the thumb as the preferred digit to suck might
suggest that it's more flavorful than, say, the index finger.
But the preference for thumbs appears to be an accidental choice,
resulting from the thumb coming into contact with the mouth during
random movements made by an infant.
Some kids also suck their fingers, hands, or their entire fists
in addition to, or instead of, their thumbs. Most thumb suckers are
younger kids. In fact, anywhere from a quarter to half of 2- to
4-year-olds suck their thumbs.
Many kids suck their thumbs to calm and comfort themselves. But
frequent or intense thumb sucking beyond 4 to 5 years of age can
cause problems, including dental problems (such as overbite), thumb
or finger infections, and being teased.
What Causes a Habit?
Why do your son's fingers appear to be an extension of his
mouth, and why is there always a propeller of hair circling above
your daughter's head? Experts admit that they're not always
sure what causes a habit, but that it
is
a learned behavior that usually provides a positive outcome for the
child.
Habits may develop as entertainment for a bored child or, more
commonly, as a coping mechanism to soothe an anxious one. The next
time you see nail-biting or hair-twirling, try to recall if your
child has recently had a stressful experience. If so, the behavior
might be your child's attempt to relieve tension just as you
would by working out at the gym.
On the other hand, some kids engage in habits when they're
relaxed, such as before falling to sleep or quietly listening to
music. Other habits may be left over from infancy. In infants,
thumb sucking is a common self-comfort behavior that has
pleasurable associations with feedings and the end of hunger. So it
may linger into childhood because of its positive associations.
Or perhaps the explanation for your child's nail biting is
in your mirror. Do you bite your nails? Studies suggest that nail
biting may have a strong familial or genetic component.
Still, other kids will engage in habits to attract attention or
as an attempt to manipulate their parents. If kids feel that their
parents are ignoring them, they may engage in the annoying habit
because they know that it will provoke a reaction from Mom or
Dad.
Coping With Your Child's Habit
The good news is that most habits disappear, usually by the time
a child reaches school age, because the child no longer needs it or
outgrows it.
But if you think it's time to help your child break a habit,
consider these steps:
-
Calmly point out what you don't like about the
behavior and why.
This approach can be used with kids as young as 3 or 4 to help
increase awareness of the problem. Say something like, "I
don't like it when you bite your nails. It doesn't look
nice. Could you try to stop doing that?" Most important, the
next time you see the nail-biting or hair-twirling, don't
scold or lecture. Punishment, ridicule, or criticism could cause
the behavior to increase.
-
Involve your child in the process of breaking the
habit.
If your 5-year-old comes home crying from kindergarten because
the other kids made fun of his thumb sucking, understand that
this is a way of asking you for help. Parents can ask their kids
what
they
think they could do to stop the habit or if they
want
to stop the habit. Come up with some ways to work on breaking the
unwanted habit together.
-
Suggest alternative behaviors.
For example, when if your child is a nail-biter, instead of
saying, "Don't bite your nails," try saying,
"Let's wiggle our fingers." This will increase
awareness of the habit and may serve as a reminder. To occupy
your child's attention, try providing a distraction, like
helping you in the kitchen or working on a craft.
-
Reward and praise
self-control
.
For example, allow your little girl to use nail polish if she
lets her nails grow. Or every time your son refrains from sucking
his thumb, reinforce the positive behavior by praising him and
giving him a sticker or other small prize.
-
Be consistent in rewarding good behavior.
If you fail to notice good behavior, it will disappear over time.
The new, positive habit must be firmly established before the old
one will disappear.
For the best success, it's important that your child is also
motivated to break the habit. And because habits take time to
develop, they're also going to take time to be replaced by
alternative behavior, so be patient.
When Is a Habit No Longer Just a Habit?
In some instances, a habit may be the result or the cause of a
physical or psychological problem. For example, a nose-picker may
be uncomfortable because there's actually an object stuck in
the nose. And the habits themselves may cause some medical
complications, such as:
-
nosebleeds
in the nose picker
- ingrown or infected
nails
in the nail biter
-
dental problems
, such as malocclusion (the failure of the teeth in the upper and
lower jaws to meet properly) or thumb or finger infections
A habit may no longer be a simple habit if it negatively affects
a child's social relationships or interferes with daily
functioning.
Older kids who constantly suck their thumb might be experiencing
significant
stress
or anxiety. If kids are the subject of teasing at school or have
difficulty talking because they won't take their thumbs out of
their mouths, the behavior has progressed beyond a simple habit.
Kids who pull their hair out may have trichotillomania, a condition
that results in hair loss. And habits that are in response to
obsessive thoughts may be a sign of OCD.
However, most habits don't cause any significant problems
and tend to improve as kids get older. But if you're concerned
about your child's habits, talk with your doctor.
Reviewed by:
Mary L. Gavin, MD
Date reviewed: September 2008
Note: All information is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice,
diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.
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